The Disapproval Matrix
The lower-left quadarant of Ann Friedman’s excellent chart is “Frenemies”:
Ooooh, this quadrant is tricky. These people really know how to hurt you, because they know you personally or know your work pretty well. But at the end of the day, their criticism is not actually about your work—it’s about you personally. And they aren’t actually interested in a productive conversation that will result in you becoming better at what you do. They just wanna undermine you.
This is helpful for me to understand. I get my fair share of jerks in the peanut gallery who can get extra sharp with their remarks because they’ve been following my work for some time, they can make it more personal and specific. I’m going to try ignoring them in the same way I ignore the garden variety trolls and haters.