The Perfect TV for 2022

Just some thoughts after looking at TVs at a Best Buy recently.

• Absolutely bare minimum software. Just the bare minimum to control the least amount of settings possible. Nothing “smart”. No “apps”.
• Turns on instantly. The boot time for the minimum software is effectively zero.
• You turn on the TV without it being on an active input, it just says “no input” on an otherwise black screen.
• No internet connectivity. You plug in a device and the device does all the internet things. Roku, Chromecast, AppleTV, etc.
• Very slim or no bezel. I don’t need to see the edge of a TV.
• Both very light and very sturdy.
• Scratch-resistant screen, if possible without reducing quality.
• Whatever the best lighting is. QD-OLED? Mini LED? I don’t know, whatever one is best. Optimize around popular movies in the last 5 years.
• Whatever the best refresh rate is. 120Hz?
• You pick: stand or mount. Mount is custom designed to be perfect for this one TV, but don’t pay for it if you don’t need it.
• It needs to have all the HDMI stuff that allows for cross-communication between a whole system. HDMI eARC is the new best thing, right? But if it’s not backward compatible, throw in some HDMI ARC ports too. I think that’s all under the HDMI CEC umbrella right? That should be enabled by default.
• All HDMI all the time. Have this be the only input and output port and put like 10 of them. Space them out enough so any slightly unusual cable or dongle (e.g. Chromecast) won’t interfere with other ports. No Bluetooth, no USB, no optical audio, no ancient ports.
• Some little harness to hold an Apple TV (or the like) on the back of it.
• No speakers at all. Assume I’ll be connecting to a sound source via HDMI.
• No antenna. No channel up/down stuff.
• Perhaps even no remote control?? All the basic functions should happen mostly automatically, like inputs switch based on the last to receive valid input. Outputs are activated when something is plugged into them. Any other settings could be controlled via some kind of small input thing on the TV itself? If there is a remote, it would only need a few buttons (no channels, no volume, nothing fancy).
• Nothing exotic like backlighting. I can add that kind of thing myself with other means if I want it.
• 70″ screen and fits in my pocket!!!

But seriously — what’s the closest out there?