Tuesday, April 25th, 2006
In the break room at work yesterday someone had laid out some movie coupons. Good for three days only, the coupons could be used to see a movie at any Marcus theater for only $3.00. This is an interesting marketing technique by theaters to get movie patrons to come back – as long as they do it quickly. I used the opportunity to see a documentary film The Real Dirt on Farmer John. Long story short: Inspirational and educational film about the plight of farmers and the pain that can come from being different. Of all of the many emotions I avoid, and there are a lot of them, inspiration is near the top of the list. I hate being inspired, all it does is make you feel worse when you inevitably don’t do whatever it was you were inspired to do in the first place.
<ol> <li>Being a farmer is completely impractical unless you can come up with some brand new innovative business model which will allow you to squeak by, pending no major disasters</li> <li>If someone has a lisp they are only very, very likely to be gay</li> <li>Organic Vegetables are delicious, healthier to eat, and better for the earth. However, they are a pain in the ass to grow which makes them unreliable and expensive</li> <li>Just because a vegetable is organic doesn't mean its not genetically modified</li> <li>Hippies definition of creativity and personal expression is so cute</li> <li>If people accuse you of being a devil worshiping cult leader who kills children, clearing your name should be one of your top priorities. At the very least, adamantly denying it would probably help. Assuming, you know, that you aren't a devil worshiping cult leader that kills children</li> </ol>
Monday, March 13th, 2006
The whole concept of an all-day buffet is probably avoidable.
Friday, February 24th, 2006
Wednesday, February 22nd, 2006
Being fresh out of unwatched Netflix DVD’s and in need of some entertainment, I went to the theater to see Firewall last night. Despite there being some questionable tech(*) and having nothing to do with firewalls, it was a satisfying action-thriller. Mary Lynn Rajskub played the secretary in all her I’m-kinda-hot-in-an-Emily-Watson-kinda-way glory.
*Harrison Ford used the scanner head from a cheap fax machine connected directly to a pink iPod Mini to capture account numbers from a scrolling computer screen.
Wednesday, January 18th, 2006
Man alive. I’ve had super bad gas the last couple days. Very unusual for me, especially at this “really shouldn’t leave the house” level.
So… almost everything.
I have concluded that the only food you can eat to totally avoid gas is: Mentos. I’m thinking of going on an all-Mentos diet for a while, I’ll report later.
Monday, January 16th, 2006
Very similar names, and they both make you see melting clocks.
(Elapsed time: 5 minutes)
Sunday, January 8th, 2006
Why buy used when you can buy a Kia?
Friday, December 16th, 2005
I went to go see King Kong last night. I was a little tired to begin with, so the first hour or so was putting me right to sleep, but not to fret, almost the entire last two-thirds of the movie is high-power actionriffic. There was even a completely gratuitous scene in this rocky valley where the team fought off giant bugs for a good 10+ minutes.